Tuesday, February 25, 2014

I'm Back! A look at my past, present and future!

I know I have been away for quite sometime. Life got a hold of me and took me places I never been, taught me things I never knew, and showed me how making changes didn't have to be impossible.

      For starters, almost two years ago, I was living in a different house. I had different set of friends, a different job, and a different family. I was a different person. I worked hard and played harder! I was wild and adventurous. I cared about what others thought of me and made sure to keep those walls high. I wore the best smile that I knew how to fake and rocked my hardcore personality. I was surrounded by people that were just ask fake as me. The only true love that I could feel at that point was from my two boys. But what did they know, they only knew what they were taught, what they lived and it was definitely not a life that I was proud of. I gave up! I was excepting that my life was going to always remain the same. I was too scared of the consequences if I tried to change things. 

Then something amazing happened. I found someone, or better yet they found me. He somehow seen something in me that I couldn't find myself. Even while standing in the middle of a hurricane of hate he stood by me. He pushed me forward and helped me to believe that I could overcome the mess I had made of me. All the criticism my family endure, all the friendships and bonds broken, all the panic attacks and jager induced comas. He stood in the middle of my dead end road, grabbed my heart and walked me home. Changing myself and the life I was use to was a scary battle, but a battle I'm glad I fought. 

Today, I am glad to call this man my husband. I married Steven last June. We had a small intimate ceremony, but to us it was one of the biggest days of our lives. I couldn't ask for a better man to be standing beside. Better yet, I not only love him, I love myself. I love who I've become and who I now know I can be. Our future may not be promised in anyway, but I know that ours is bright. It will be full of love and joy. 

I am so blessed to find a wonderful husband and father. Even more blessed to have found myself. I will forever be so thankful!